the HAPPINESS PROJECT awaits. march is subtitled “aim higher”. what a coincidence. after having only done 3 out of 6 workouts on p90x last week, i started back up this morning with the 4th workout, yoga, thinking that i would just finish out the 1st week’s workouts, even if it took me two weeks.
i couldn’t even get through 30 minutes of the 1 1/12 HOURS of yoga. and not because i was hurting or winded. but i simply didn’t want to downward dog my big butt up in the air for another minute. i gave up.
i certainly haven’t given up on complaining, so surely i have enough stick-to-it power to make it through these workouts. i just don’t wanna.
on one hand ~ i did just do 25 minutes of fantastic yoga. on any other day, i would have applauded myself and felt like a champion. but since i’m doing this p90x thing, and i really want to get through the 90 days, and hopefully see results? i just feel yucky.
i feel like there is no hope for me, when it comes to consistency. i can’t consistently remember to do anything.
back to the HAPPINESS PROJECT. the first line of the march chapter states: “happiness is a critical factor for work, and work is a critical factor for happiness.” it goes on to talk about people’s relationships with working. and i thought i would stop and ponder that, before i try to name my list of things to consider this month.
how do i feel about my job?
how do YOU feel about your job? whoever is reading this, please respond if you can.
i feel cheated by my job. i feel like i work all the time, and the outcome is a butt load of taxes i have to pay on april 15. i feel like my priorities are forced to be work, work, work, when i want so many other things for my life. i grieve in the mornings. i get up as early as i possibly can, workout, blog, check e-mails and try to do some housework, because i know that by the time i get home tonight, probably around 8, i’ll be good for nothing. the hub won’t get home until 9. i know a lot of people who have schedules like this, and i hope they’re happy. i’m just not. i’m not meant to be a person who works morning, noon and night, with a messy house and takeout for dinner. i’m just not that person. and if i had a job that paid me well, i would at least be able to say i was making good money! but i’m not!
i’ll quit complaining now. i’m going to change my job status next year, so really, this is the last semester i will be feeling like this.