I can’t believe it’s already day 78 of this crazy challenge!! The last few weeks of 4M failure REALLY shouldn’t count, but struggling and failing is all part of this process. Right? RIGHT????
The past few weeks have been A LLLLOT. I’m like a helium balloon in a park, bobbing from tree to tree, never hitting the ground. That sounds fun, but it’s soooo not fun when you’re trying to grow.
I need to feel more grounded, and I don’t quite know how to do that when there’s so much going on every single day.
I’m really working hard to set my life up for success, while also just trying to survive the craziness that comes with a freakin’ pandemic.
Whether I have the capacity for it or not, these are months of major transition.
Are they for you, as well?
I heard somewhere that we can expect some kind of transition to occur almost every decade of our lives. When you look back at your life, can you find a transition in every decade? Or maybe two?
In my 20’s, I transitioned from a college person to an adult (ish) person and a working opera singer. I transitioned from my first high school sweetheart, who I just knew I was going to marry and spend the rest of my life with, to a whole slew of relationships that were either complicated, dangerous, or just plain not going anywhere. At the end of my 20’s, I found myself in Germany, and that year was the most transformative, eye-opening experience of my life.
The beginning of my 30’s were dramatic, to say the least. I married a flat-out, bonafide NARCISSIST. A successful, incredible, smart, amazing person, but a victim of his childhood. I didn’t want to give up on him, but he eventually pushed me away, and I thank him for that. I suffered through many highs and lows, indescribable pain that I wasn’t prepared to deal with, and even two miscarriages to top it all off. The experiences I had with him read like a bad Hallmark movie (no offense to Hallmark). I could tell you more, but you wouldn’t believe me.
Anyway, when I realized I could start over anywhere in the world, I contemplated Paris. Wouldn’t you? But I immediately knew where to go. Kansas City. BEST decision of my life.
And so, the next transition began. That’s where I started over. That’s where my singing career really took off in the way I wanted it to. That’s where I met my current brilliant, very cute and very very tall, non-narcissist hub. Maybe a teensy bit selfish, but aren’t we all?
And now it has been 11 years with my wonderful hub (9 years married) and because the two of us are devoted to living our best lives and becoming better together, my next transition is happening RIGHT NOW.
My 40’s ~ my body is not cooperating, but it could be worse. I don’t recognize myself in the mirror, and I have taken up a new career, or two. YIKES. The 40’s are almost more than I can handle, but I’m really feeling great about the payoff ~ which will probably not show its beautiful head until I’m 50. We’ll see.
My transition into the next phase includes the following:
- Real Estate! WOOT WOOT! I’m such a newbie, but I already LOVE it.
- Only singing what I want to sing from here on out. Sounds simple enough, right? It’s not. It’s very hard, actually. But I’m working on it!
- Making Raise Your Virtual Voice available and affordable for anyone who can benefit from it.
- Moving every single day, as if my life depends on it.
- Eating healthy 80% of the time, and enjoying slutty desserts and drinks 20% of the time. #donutsandwineforlife
- Keeping my priorities straight as much as possible. My priorities lie in my health, happiness, peace, organization (I know that sounds nerdy, but I can’t help it) and friends/family. In that order. Sorry friends and family ~ organization comes before you! Just being honest here.
Oh and sorry, stress ~ you didn’t make the list, honey. You’re DEAD TO ME.
Thank you for sharing. I suffered through two disastrous marriages, the second very much like your first. It took decades to get over him and move on. I wish you all the best in your careers and your life. I have enjoyed singing with you.
Thank you so much for your honesty, Joyce. I’m SO sorry about your marriages, and I’m so glad you finally moved on. It’s so hard to move on, isn’t it?
May this spirit of bold honesty and open communication with the world be wind in your sails!
Singing only when you want to is a WONDERFUL goal. We get trapped into thinking that only the starving, struggling artist is a “true” artist…and it’s simply not true.
This is so lovely, Liz. Thank you for your friendship!
Love you so much, my sweet friend. May we get to see each other and hug sometime soon…
Love you too, Anonymous! Whoever you are, I love you!